Finding Joy in the Little Things

 When I think back to how I was as a kid, I remember being quiet and mostly happy. I loved reading, I loved playing soccer, and I loved my family. As I got older (middle school age or so), friendships became increasingly important to me, and they would remain as one of my top priorities well into my adult years. Those are the things that brought me joy when I was younger.

As I navigate this season of life, with high schoolers and elementary aged kids (two different worlds as a parent), I am grateful for opportunities to find joy in the little things again. When I was drinking, I wouldn't see the good in the little things, because my thoughts were always clouded with other things, competing priorities, and avoiding reality versus appreciating the mundane and quieter beauties in my life. 

Finding joy in the little things these days include much simpler things. A cup of coffee to start my day, the quiet of Monday mornings when everyone is at school and Nick is at work. The cool breeze in the evenings, which will soon be replaced by the sticky heat of summer nights in So Cal. Walks in the morning with my husband when he has a day off. Road trips to San Diego and Big Bear, and days at home enjoying the pool. Watching/hearing my daughter enjoy time with her friends in our home. Being able to be the safe home that her friends feel comfortable in, and knowing that I'm present and able to just be without having to mask my discomfort or insecurities with drinking. Watching a movie with my 10-year-old on a weekday evening because he's reading the book in school and asked me to watch the movie with him, and how he scoots as close as he can to me while we watch it. Micah appreciates closeness when he is feeling a little unsettled, and I know that I am one of few people in his world that can provide that comfort to him. I sense a settled-ness in Micah that probably wasn't there when I was drinking, because I wasn't as safe for him as I am now. 

Reading a book to unwind, having a handful of chocolate chips as a sweet treat, rather than an entire bag of candy like I may have done to drown out negative feelings or overwhelm or anxiety in the past. A massage every couple of months to treat myself, getting my nails done, and blogging. These are a few of my favorite things, and I am so glad that I get to enjoy them without feeling the weight of regret or guilt for not being fully present in my everyday life. 

"Joy is what happens when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things are." - Marianne Williamson

"We simply cannot know joy without embracing vulnerability - and the way to do that is to focus on gratitude, not fear." - Brene Brown